Tuesday, July 13, 2004

All is quiet is Blogger World because everyone is over at Hamster Time reading the BB5 recaps (myself included - I am reality TV's bitch.)

I started my medication over the weekend. Adderall, which is in the same family as Ritalin. This shit is SERIOUS stuff! My doc had to get approval from my insurance company, fill out a Federal Narcotics prescription form (in triplicate) and he cannot call in refills. I have to get a new prescription every month. Apparently, it's a controlled substance. Given to a girl who can count on two hands how many times she has gotten high.

It's working though! I noticed at breakfast on Saturday that my head was quiet for once. It used to seem like I constantly had a million running monlogues in my brain. All that went away.

I went out with Dez and some other friends on Saturday to see White Chicks. It was a hilarious movie but what was cool was that Dez commented to HammieLove the next day that I seemed more balanced. Other people could see a difference with just one dose! Too cool.

We all took our bikes to a local track on Sunday. I haven't been on my dirt bike in 4 months, so I was a little anxious. We met some new people and they were all really nice. This one guy, Troy, saw me hesitating at the top of the beginners track (there were LOTS of berms, I hate berms). He came over to talk to me and told me to take it slow and follow him. (A funny thing happened when he did this...HL cut across the track to see who was talking to me. I think it is cute when he gets jealous. He realized who it was though -Troy is married and his wife and kid were there- and he relaxed.) I got all tense and frustrated with myself when I couldn't get the hang of the track.

A realization dawned on me though when I started to get in a bad mood. "I am here to have fun!" I tried to relax and just have fun. I may not be the greatest rider, but I am trying to come back after two pretty bad crashes and no one expects me to be Jeremy McGrath. I was able to talk myself out of a bad mood and I have NEVER been able to do that. I really think that meds are helping stabilize my mood.

I rode the little track a couple more times, switching off with Dez because the Raptor had a flat. Went back to our little staging area and I watched all the really good riders on the "big boys" track. Doubles, triples, jumps, rythym sections, the whole deal. I watched for a while and decided that I wanted to try it. I can't jump, but Troy said that I could roll up and over everything out there.

So I mount up and go out to the track. I sat by the start trying to get a feel for the layout, when Troy came over again. He said "Stick with me, we'll go slow and everyone will go around. Don't worry." He started out and would signal me when to stand up and when to sit down. We were going really slow, I barely got out of first, but I was proud of myself for even being out there. It was awesome to roll up the jumps and have a good rider whiz past you and suddenly be four feet OVER your head when he hits the jump and goes for it. It was cool.

So we are almost to the end of the track, last thing to hit was a small set of whoops. Troy signals me to stand up and I do, but I lean too far back, grabbing a handful of throttle that I didn't want. The bike takes off, hits the whoop completely wrong and the next thing I know, I am on the ground with my left leg pinned under my bike.

FUCK. I guess they don't call me "Crash" for nothing, right?

I was able to get my bike off of me and up before Troy or any of the other guys could get over to me. I tell him I am okay and to PLEASE stop signalling for the track officials because I am already embarrassed enough. Easiest part of the track and I crash. Figures.

I start up Bubba (my bike) and ride off the track. A couple of guys smile at me and I jokingly hang my head. I can't tell if they are thinking "Dumb girl" or if they were impressed that I got up so quickly and got back on. I really don't care.

So my souvenir for this weekend is a HUGE ( I am talking the size of a small dinner plate) black bruise on my left thigh, the whole left side of my knee is scraped and bruised, along with my elbow and shoulder. Whiplash on the right side of my neck (that gifted me with a massive headache yesterday) from when my helmet hit the ground. And this morning, I discovered a big bruise on the side of my right boob. Love tap from the handlebars, no doubt.

And you know what? I can't wait to get back out there.


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