Happy Effing V Day

I know this whole situation is of my creation but that knowledge doesn't make it suck any less.

I am watching all the girls at work getting their flowers and their promise rings and being all happy and excited about tonight.

I am sitting here thinking about the logistics of my move, and sad because I am hurting someone and longing to be with the one I really want to be with.

I am not going out tonight because I couldn't make everyone happy. Except now I am not happy.

-sigh- I just want this day to be over with.

Starting Over

Loren and I broke up last night. I was the one doing the breaking up. He is shocked and hurt but he understands my reasons.

I am heartbroken too at the moment, so I will post later if anyone cares to hear.

No Words

The right words elude me
I only see sunlight and green grass
I smell cotton candy
And hear babies laughing
And feel the warmth of your palm in mine
The words evaporate from my mind
I only see starlight
Smell the sweet ocean breeze
Hear the waves crash and the birds cry
And feel your breath on my cheek
The words melt from the tip of my tongue
But I see the ecstasy in your eyes
I smell the sweat on your skin
And hear the catch in your breath
And I feel you, only you my love
No words, only you.

Smoke Watch 2007


Time Smoke-Free: 35 days, 11 hours, 54 minutes and 55 seconds
Cigarettes NOT smoked: 355
Lifetime Saved: 2 days, 17 hours
Money Saved: $67.72

Still NOT ONE PUFF! :) Woot!

My Desire Has No Mercy

(Mom, cover your eyes!)

Enveloped by your embrace
Entranced by your scent, your taste
My desire has no mercy.
Arching beneath you
The hands fisted in my hair are my tether to this world
The emotions in your eyes are the anchor to my soul
As I am being driven screaming towards oblivion's edge
Exploding around you
Scattering us like seeds in the Wind
To which we have thrown all caution and thoughts of Fate.